I'm Fine: The Lie We Tell Ourselves About Stress and Pain.

Research shows that stress-related illnesses, both mental and physical, are on the rise.

We’ve all said it before—when someone asks how we’re doing, the automatic response is, “I’m fine.” It’s an easy answer, a quick way to move on from the question. But sometimes, it’s a lie we tell not only others but also ourselves. We say we’re fine even when our body is screaming otherwise, or when our mind feels like it's running on empty. I spent years telling myself this same lie.

Living the High Life, or So I Thought.

In my 30s, I had what many people would consider the "perfect life." I was young, traveling the world, meeting new people, and making loads of money as a pilot. I partied in exciting new cities, living what seemed like the ultimate dream. This is the high life, the one everyone wants—so I must have been fine, right? No one expects to be struggling when they’re on top of the world.

But beneath all the external success, my body and mind were slowly falling apart. For 24 years, I worked as a pilot. At first, it was a job I loved, but over time, it took an immense toll on me—both physically and mentally. Yet, I refused to admit the growing signs of burnout. I was too focused on pushing through, doing my job, and trying to convince myself—and others—that I was fine.

Ignoring the Physical Signs of Burnout.

Over the years, my body was giving me clear signs that something was wrong. I developed severe sciatica, a pain that would shoot down my left legs. There were days I could barely sit in the cockpit, but I would just pop a few Panadol and get on with it. Fatigue became a constant companion, the kind of bone-deep tiredness that sleep couldn’t fix. But even sleep itself became a struggle—I battled insomnia, finding it harder and harder to shut my mind off at night. Often, the pain would wake me up in the night.

My immune system was in free fall. I had frequent colds and coughs, almost as if my body was screaming for a break. Severe rhinitis and blocked sinuses were my norm, yet I told myself I just had to keep going. A box of Clarinaze (my antihistamine of choice) always sat within reach, and they became a part of my daily routine.

But I never paused long enough to ask myself the important question: Was I really fine?

The Mental Health Toll: Stress and Anxiety.

The physical symptoms were bad enough, but mentally, I was struggling too. I was burned out, mentally exhausted, and it became harder and harder to find joy in anything. On my days off, I didn’t feel motivated to do anything, not even the things I used to enjoy. Everything felt like a chore, even rest. There was a general sense of malaise hanging over me, but I refused to look too closely at it. I was functioning, I thought. I was still doing my job, still showing up. So I must be fine, right?

Except, I wasn’t.

"It wasn’t just physical pain I was dealing with—my entire life was out of balance. I had normalized constant stress, anxiety, and suffering."

A Moment of Realisation: Breaking Free from the Lie.

There wasn’t a single moment when I realised everything was falling apart—it was more of a slow, creeping realisation over time. But one pivotal moment stands out. I had been self-medicating for so long—Panadol and Clarinaze just to get through the day. When the pain and exhaustion got too much to bear, I sought help. I went for my first BodyTalk session, mainly to address my sciatica.

I went in expecting to treat the pain in my leg. What I didn’t expect was for that session to open my mind to all the other things I had been in denial about. It wasn’t just my leg that needed help—my entire life was out of balance. I had normalised living in a state of constant pain and stress. For the first time, I admitted to myself that I couldn’t continue like this.

The Bigger Picture: Why Ignoring Mental Health and Pain is Dangerous.

My story isn’t unique. Millions of people, particularly in high-stress professions, live with physical and mental symptoms they dismiss. We push through because we’re conditioned to, but at what cost?

The statistics tell the same story. Research shows that stress-related illnesses, both mental and physical, are on the rise. Chronic stress, untreated mental health issues, and burnout are becoming alarmingly common across the globe.

In Malaysia, for example, a UNICEF Malaysia report in 2023 revealed that nearly two in five youths aged 13 to 17 struggle with anxiety, while one in five face depression​(UNICEF). On a global scale, the World Health Organization (WHO) reports that 1 in 7 adolescents worldwide between the ages of 10 and 19 experience a mental health disorder, primarily anxiety and depression. The COVID-19 pandemic has only exacerbated these issues, leading to a 25% increase in the prevalence of anxiety and depression globally​(World Health Organization (WHO))​(World Health Organization (WHO)).

Call to Action: It’s Okay Not to Be “Fine”.

It took stepping away from my career and facing my pain head-on to understand how deeply unhappy and unhealthy I had been. I know I’m not alone in this experience. If sharing my story can help even one person stop and reflect on their own well-being, it’s worth telling.

It’s okay not to be fine. What’s not okay is ignoring your pain and mental health, because eventually, it catches up with you. If you’ve been telling yourself that you’re fine—maybe it’s time to stop and ask, “Am I really?”

Today, as a BodyTalk practitioner, my mission is to help others reconnect with their bodies and minds in a way that brings balance and healing. I’ve learned that true health is about so much more than just pushing through—it’s about addressing the root causes of our stress, anxiety, and physical symptoms. Through BodyTalk, I help others listen to their bodies, release stored stress, and find a path to well-being that truly resonates with them.

If you’re ready to start listening to your body and mind, I invite you to explore BodyTalk and take the first step toward a healthier, more balanced life.